The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
