and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
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Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
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He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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