D3 body, D1 cock
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I am full of burrito and curiosity
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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