I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
