**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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