he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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