we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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