So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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