Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize
