It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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