Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
