Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
