Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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