its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize