Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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