Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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