Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
This house was built for laser tag.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
