Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
It's shark week go big or go home
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize