When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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