May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Another day, another engagement, another cat
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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