Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
