how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
