is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
