I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Randomize
