just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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