he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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