To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
