just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
tell me about the eggs
Randomize