Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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