I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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