is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
BRING THE BAGELS
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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