lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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