just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
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It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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