Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
