You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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