wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
