Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
