I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
