I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
