How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
