I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
She bit a glass in half.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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