Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
