physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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