There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
