he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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