You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize