grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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