we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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