I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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