she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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